on the eve

The temperature has been dropping all afternoon.
Snow moves in and dusts everything,
then the sky lightens a minute,
before clouds thicken again.

We're keeping warm -
both woodstoves have been burning
for days.

Today we ventured out
on short cold hike.
We were the only things
moving for miles.

Mom, I know
what that pink thing is
way over there...

It's Amelia.

I packed cookies and hot chocolate
for a break along the way
but it was too cold to stop
moving.  So we huddled
in the car and licked
sprinkles from our fingers.
Back home
the girls bundled up
beneath the tree.

Amelia always wins.
Go fish...
Now it's holding
at nine degrees.
Hope Mr. Claus is wearing
his wool underwear.

Peace + Love, Ellie

peace + joy + sprinkles

The're calling for snow the next three days.
Nothing yet.  This morning
unfolded brilliant skyblue.
Time for an adventure
before settling in
for the storm.
I think we've met our sugar quota.
Outside we go
to burn off some sprinkles.

Merry Christmas out there!

Peace + Love,

Ellie

this solstice

We were up before the sun this morning.
Color crept into the sky, gray to pink to blue.

We drove south with an empty trailer
to the ranch of an old family friend.
Dell, Montana is windswept
and streaked with frozen snow -
but it feels so close to the sky.




The seam of hilltop
to horizon can be hard
to find.



This lady licked my hand
and let me pat her head.
I would have brought her home
if those horns would fit
in the trailer.

Have you ever seen a more joyful looking pig?

As we turned for home
the afternoon light grew weak
and we stopped for lunch
at this old schoolhouse-turned-cafe.


Our three new shaggy friends
waited patiently for us
to take them home.

finding words

Just twenty-four hours ago, so much changed. 
My heart feels twisted with vulnerability
when I look at the faces of my children,
with a kind of selfish hunger for them,
for their smiles and beating hearts. 

I feel a physical longing
to hold those mothers and fathers
in Connecticut.  To wrap them in my arms
and cry with them, these strangers
whose love I know...even if I can only
imagine their devastation
this morning. 

It must seem
like a dream.

I think of those children,
those children that were just like mine.

This loss belongs to all of us.
We need to mourn,
to teach love in the face of sorrow
and to hold each other up
through the soul-wrenching losses
and the new day
that begins before
we are ready.